These are issues that I do know to be true. There’s a movie within the works known as 80 For Brady, which follows 4 girls of their eighties as they go on a highway journey for see Tom Brady in Tremendous Bowl LI. These 4 girls are performed by Academy Award winners Lily Tomlin, Jane Fonda, Rita Moreno, and Sally Subject. (Inexplicably, Guy Fieri, can also be a member of the solid.) This movie will premiere in theaters on February 3, 2023. Approach again in November, 80 For Brady‘s trailer took me on a journey that left me questioning my very existence, asking a really particular listing of queries, which you’ll learn under.
Now, months later, as we close to the unholy crash of 80 For Brady into Earth’s crust and what lies beneath, my anguish continues. A brand new music, which has been crafted particularly for this movie, has debuted. It options one other quintet of legends: Dolly Parton, Belinda Carlisle, Cyndi Lauper, Gloria Estefan and Debbie Harry. It has been dubbed, “Gonna Be You.” I remorse to tell you that “Gonna Be You” has a music video. Reader, I pray for reduction. Preacher, I ask that my sins could also be absolved. Whereas I lament my consciousness—the one which has allowed me to bear witness to “Gonna Be You”—and picture a time once I might not have it, you may watch this unusual and considerably threatening sequence of photographs under. Be a part of me afterward, in communion, to determine the place humanity goes from right here.
The Music Video
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80 FOR BRADY | Gonna Be You | Dolly Parton•Belinda Carlisle•Cyndi Lauper•Gloria Estefan•Debbie Harry
- Is that… a Dolly Partonified Tom Brady jersey? The hell?!
- After I see 80 For Brady, and this music blares over the credit, why am I sure that I am going to get goosebumps?
- Why does the observe’s underlying wub-wub-wub-wub-wub make me crave a Dolly Parton EDM pivot?
- This one I am asking on to Dolly, Belinda, Cyndi, Gloria, and Debbie: How a lot did they pay you to put on a Tom Brady jersey and lip-sync in entrance of a inexperienced display screen?!
- Will you pray for me?
- Was this music impressed by Jane Fonda’s considerably stalker-y method of making friends?
- Did Tom Brady approve of this music? Possibly if he sings “Gonna Be You,” a capella, to Invoice Belichick, they will be greatest buddies once more?
- If I am drowning within the chilly, deep water, are you able to please not come to my rescue? Let me drown.
- Did Cyndi Lauper simply end an Inventing Anna binge? ITS GAUWNA BEE YAAUUUUOOOOOO—
- After I die, will you pull out your telephone, pull up Spotify, and play “Gonna Be You” to my corpse, to show that this life is as meaningless as I think?
The Trailer
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- After we all went into lockdown in March 2020, did I fall sleep and undergo from an prolonged pandemic dream (it’s a real thing!) that’s lastly crescendoing with the 80 For Brady trailer?
- It doesn’t matter what I am about to ask right here, will the truth that Tomlin, Fonda, Moreno, and Subject are in 80 For Brady cease me from loving it? (The reply is not any.)
- Why is the Rob Gronkowski erotica gag so humorous? WHY!
- Another about that ebook: Kristen Stewart, is that you simply?!
- OK, this isn’t a query: Lily Tomlin dab. Lily Tomlin dab!
- Who’s the human who needed to superimpose Man Fieri’s head on prime of six completely different our bodies, together with Rita Moreno’s, and why aren’t they making more cash than Tom Brady’s base wage for the Bucs?
- When is the Gronk and Fonda rom-com spinoff hitting theaters?
- Can we get particulars about when, precisely, Tommy Braids agreed to all of this? Was this a kneejerk resolution throughout his 48 hours of retirement?
- How does every little thing Sally Subject say on this preview genuinely make me need to weep?
- How will the world react when Fonda, Moreno, Subject, and Tomlin make up 4 of the 5 Greatest Actress slots on the 2024 Academy Awards?
- Is releasing this movie on February 3—a few week earlier than the Tremendous Bowl—essentially the most inexcusable match of Tom Brady bravado we have ever seen?
- The place can I purchase these bejeweled-looking soccer jerseys?
- Will there be a Tom Brady MAGA hat zinger anyplace in 80 For Brady?
- Can we get a reside, televised model of the Spicy BBQ Sizzling Wings problem, the place Sally Subject really goes full Hot Ones?
- If I die from acute coronary heart failure throughout the hour, will you, reader, bury me in Flavortown and inform Man Fieri that he did this to me?
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